Pocketful of Mojo

Celebrate! YOU are the Special Occasion

Steph Season 1 Episode 24

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What if the secret to unlocking inner peace and profound personal growth lies not in grand gestures, but in the simple act of daily gratitude? Join me, Steph, your Mojo Maven, on this empowering episode of Pocketful of Mojo, where we embrace the mantra, "I celebrate the life I am already living." Together, we'll explore how acknowledging the present moment and practicing gratitude can illuminate the path to self-improvement, while also keeping us grounded in appreciation. Discover how to differentiate between genuine self-betterment and ego-driven comparisons, and find delight in celebrating your journey with small yet meaningful pleasures.

Tired of feeling burned out, lost, or dependent on outside validation? It's time to shift your focus inward. In this episode, we tackle the detrimental effects of burnout, identity loss, and resentment, and how these patterns can drain our emotional and physical well-being. Learn practical steps to honor yourself, build self-esteem, and set healthy boundaries, fostering a sense of inner peace. By transforming these negative habits, you'll not only improve your personal well-being but also enhance your relationships and set a positive example for others.

Ready to become your biggest supporter? We delve into four powerful strategies to foster self-appreciation and growth. From the reflective practices of journaling and self-talk to creating self-appreciation rituals and setting personal milestones, discover how to build a positive narrative about yourself. As you celebrate each small victory, you'll boost your self-esteem and stay motivated. Finally, get a sneak peek into next week's episode, where we'll unravel the concepts of recognition and praise and learn to maintain a healthy relationship with them. Stay awesome, spread positive vibes, and always be kind!

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to your new favorite podcast, pocketful of Mojo, where you're you and I'm Steph, and we tune in here to tap into some mojo. You see, I think I've cracked the code to being happy. I'm happy every single day. I'm not even kidding. Now look, I wasn't always this way, and not to flex, but I've had breakdowns on multiple continents and in two languages. But by paying attention and living with more intention, I've created this wellness first aid kit full of amazing tools that help me get out of life's most sticky and stressful situations, and do it with grace and self-love. And I'm not here to gatekeep. In fact, I'm on a mission to help you tap into your best stuff and remember that you have everything you need to live your life on your own terms. So settle in. We are here for some positive change. So let's explore together where your mojo meets the road. In today's episode, I'm going to review our mantra for the week and then we're going to dig into today's main topic, which is self-celebration Celebrate. You know how to find inspiration from celebration. It's something that I've mastered over the last couple of years, so I'm super excited to share this one with you over the last couple of years. So I'm super excited to share this one with you. So you stick around and I'm going to make sure that you're glad that you did. Let's get started with today's mantra and get tuned in, tapped in and turned on. Hello, hello, hello and welcome, welcome.

Speaker 1:

It's the 24th episode of Pocketful of Mojo and once again, I'm Steph, I'm your Mojo Maven, I'm your cheerleader, I'm your soul sister and I'm super glad that you're here. This is going to be a super fun episode. So, pitter, patter, let's get at her. Let's start by digging into today's mantra. Today's mantra is I celebrate the life I am already living. Oh, fuck, yeah, you are Okay. I love this one. Let's unpack it. It's awesome. It's like an unboxing video, only it's audio and way cooler. Okay, so I celebrate the life that I'm already living, absolutely Okay.

Speaker 1:

So this combines so much of what we already know and it leverages those nuggets of wisdom into a powerful mantra that sets us up for some rapid eye opening, up for some rapid, eye-opening, powerful change. Because, you see, this hits many ways. Because, number one, the only thing that it truly exists is this moment, the one that we're in right now. The past, it's only as strong as our flawed memory, and the future hasn't even happened yet. So the now is all we've got. Truly so, when we pause and take a moment to engage fully with this mantra, we are tapped into this moment and setting up shop as the mayor of Gratitudeville. We have a lot to be grateful for, so it's always a good idea to take a beat and remember why I celebrate the life I'm already living.

Speaker 1:

The second way that this mantra hits extra hard is the way that the brain is going to start saying like well, wait, we still have so much to do. Well, wait, so many things we want to achieve and so many things that we desire, so many things that we want to improve. Bingo, this is exposing the gap between the life that you're currently living and still grateful for, and the life that you aspire to live. So when you hear that little voice inside you whispering but we want more, it's not selfishness talking. It's your higher self pointing out that there are places in your life where you can maybe make some different choices that align with your best stuff. Simple as that. The key now is to tune into your higher self, the one that wants more balance, more peace, more alignment, and not the ego who's going to compare the life that you have now to someone else's. This isn't that okay. It's going to try to compare your life to someone else's. It's going to try to tell you that you want the new purse or the new car or the life that someone or something convinced you that was the path to happiness. They kind of sound the same, so you got to watch out for that.

Speaker 1:

I celebrate the life I'm already living, and we haven't even gotten to the celebration part yet. Celebration can look like so many different things. It can be as simple as a nice one that you say to yourself when you see the fruits of your hard work come back to you. Or it could be that midweek trip for ice cream, just because you know a good life involves ice cream. Prove me wrong. But it could be calling your bestie to share the good news about your promotion or the fact that you've gotten up every day this week to work out. There is no feat too small that is worthy of celebration. I celebrate the life I am already living, and this all adds up to one noble truth You're exactly where you're supposed to be, learning exactly what you're supposed to learn, and you're grateful for having come this far, and that is worth celebrating. Surrendering to this idea is truly liberating and, at the same time, it shows yourself grace for all that you've overcome and all that you've achieved. I celebrate the life I'm already living.

Speaker 1:

Okay, here we go. You know, I'll always remember the day that I realized that I don't have to wait for New Year's Eve or a wedding to drink champagne. I know, look, I know that sounds silly, but I like rules. I grew up loving rules and being highly compliant, and I thought that this was one of them. Okay, I was young, I didn't know any better, but, man, that was a very good day. It was this like aha moment, and I'm sure, if you were there, you would have seen the light bulb go off over my head, realizing that I'd been playing by some arbitrary rules that don't even exist. It was a game changer. I realized that this meant that I had some blind spots that were stopping me from squeezing all the juice out of this sweet life and of course, by juice, you know, I mean champagne.

Speaker 1:

So let's talk about something we often overlook. In our mission to make everyone around us happy, we forget about celebrating ourselves. Yes, that's right, celebrating you. As people pleasers, we're naturally wired to focus on other people's needs and hope for their approval. Sometimes, or often, this is at the expense of our own happiness and recognizing ourselves. So you know, guess what time it is.

Speaker 1:

It's time to flip the script and dive into the importance of self-celebration. Let's look at why it's essential and how we can honor ourselves and still keep a healthy and grounded perspective. Now, this does come with a caution and a warning. These could be things that are preventing you from celebrating your hard work and your worthy contributions. So heads up. So, before we get into self-celebration, let's have a look at the pitfalls of trying to please others. So these are the things that we are going to be letting go of. Or, if you're looking for more self-celebration, you'll need to sacrifice things that you're doing now in order to make room for the new way of living.

Speaker 1:

So let's look at a few things that we can afford to let go of, for example. Number one a burnout. It doesn't look good on anyone and the worst part, we do it to ourselves. Putting other people first can lead to physical and emotional exhaustion, and you can't pour from an empty cup, am I right? The second thing we're going to let go of is our loss of identity. When you're always adapting to fit other people's expectations, you can lose touch with who you are and what you want. But be careful it's a slow drip and it can sneak up on you.

Speaker 1:

Another sign that you're living out of alignment is resentment. It's another sneaky one. Over time, always giving and rarely receiving can start to give you feelings of resentment towards the same people that you're trying to please. The internal conflict is real and this is a signal that something is out of alignment, and this signal is going to get louder. The next thing we're going to get ready to let go of is depending on outside validation, always looking for that gold star Relying on other people's approval. It usually starts early in life and takes some awareness to reverse, but it is reversible.

Speaker 1:

When your sense of worth relies on someone else's recognition, it's neither reliable nor sustainable. And who are they anyway? And why do they matter more than your own opinion? Which takes us to number five overlooking your own awesome. In the rush to make other people happy, your own accomplishments can go unnoticed, even by yourself. It doesn't have to be that way. What would it look like if you took your moment to shine? Now let's flip the lens inward.

Speaker 1:

Honoring yourself isn't about becoming self-centered I want to call that out right away. It's about recognizing your worth and all the great stuff that you've done. Here's why it's so important. The first part your self-worth and confidence. Celebrating your own successes builds self-esteem and confidence Two critical ingredients in mojo mastery. You begin to value yourself for who you are, not just what you do for other people. The second bonus is balance and boundaries. Recognizing your own needs helps you set healthy boundaries, and this is key to preventing burnout and resentment. Now, balance and boundaries. It's going to take some self-awareness and some time, but can very much change the game. And who couldn't use a little of?

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Number three inner peace and fulfillment. Doesn't that sound nice? When you appreciate yourself, you create an inner peace and a sense of fulfillment that is not dependent on other people's validation. You get it from the source. And then what you get is, number four better relationships. When you're happy and you're confident, your relationships improve. You're able to keep giving, like we do as people pleasers, but we're doing it from a place of abundance rather than scarcity or necessity or obligation, and then you become number five. You're the inspiration. By honoring yourself, you're going out in the world and you're setting an example for other people to do the same thing. It's a ripple effect of positivity and self-respect. We know that negativity is contagious, but I've got some good news so is positivity. So let's pivot into how we can start celebrating ourselves. So this is the fun part. Here are the practical steps.

Speaker 1:

Number one self-reflection and journaling. Take the time to reflect on all your accomplishments the big stuff, the small stuff. Journaling can be really powerful, and I know I'm probably the eleventy billionth person to tell you to go journal, and I used to roll my eyes at that too, but you know why we hear it so often? It's because it's super effective. So, just taking some time to write down the things that you did well today, any challenges that you overcome, things, that little moments throughout your day that made you feel proud and if you're feeling stuck or you need a boost to get going, start with what you're grateful for the people, the moments, the choices you made and the decisions, the tests that you passed, the person that you didn't punch in the face when they were talking stupid these are all worth writing down. You can look back on all the things you've done this week, this month or over the last 10 years and you're gonna start to see a trend.

Speaker 1:

You were the artist who made these things happen. You are in the starring role in each of these moments. I can tell you that I've done this exercise in traffic, and if the traffic's not great sometimes, I can really get lost in it in the very best way. I've been known to end up in full blown tears of joy over all that I'm grateful for, especially if the right song is playing now to mention it. Now, that's been embarrassing to admit, but I have to remind myself that I'm capable of so much. Otherwise, there are crazy voices in my head that will tell me that I can't or I shouldn't, and those voices can fuck right off. So try this. Keep a celebration journal and I really encourage you to feel free to call it something cooler than that where you get to jot down three things that you're proud of every day. It could be anything from finishing a project to continuing on the project, to being patient in a tough situation. Sometimes we have days where it's a miracle that we didn't punch that person in the face, and that's a win. Sometimes we have days where we were on fire and it seemed like no one even noticed and guess what, my friend? How you feel about it is all that matters, so write it down.

Speaker 1:

Coming in at number two affirmations and positive self-talk. Positive affirmations were one of the keys to my own personal comeback, when I was at my lowest and felt like I'd been running on empty for what felt like forever. I made a choice. I chose to flood my head with positive, uplifting, motivational affirmations. I set it up on my phone and it gave me a chirp like several times a day with words that grounded me in powerful messages that help me rewire my thoughts and help keep me going.

Speaker 1:

Now, if you follow me on Instagram, you'll know that you not only get a daily mantra, but a handful of positive affirmations. I post these to remind you of all your good stuff. Sometimes we just need a reminder. Sometimes we need to turn up the volume on what we already know but have forgotten, or maybe you've been distracted by your circumstances or your environment. So you can try this Replace the negative self-talk with positive affirmations.

Speaker 1:

Remind yourself that your strengths and achievements are regularly keeping you going. You control the script of the voice inside your head. Take back that power. So, for example, start your day with affirmations like I'm capable and worthy of success, or I'm proud of my accomplishments, and does it feel silly? Okay, maybe at first, but that's our comfort zone, just trying to keep us where it's safe. But a little positivity never hurt anyone, and I'm pretty sure that self-belief is a 100% in our control. So I say, give it a try. I won't tell anyone. And if you're looking for the app I used, it's called I Am and it's worth every penny and I'm worth it, and so are you. And no, I'm not an affiliate, but I'd love to be, but I am a huge advocate.

Speaker 1:

Which takes us to number three creating a self-appreciation ritual. Develop a regular practice dedicated to self-appreciation, to celebration, to play. It could be a weekly ritual where you treat yourself to something special, or simply taking time to acknowledge the hard work of the week. The way that we speak to ourselves really comes into play here. Setting yourself up for some appreciation may feel new, because for a lot of us, the appreciation basket seldom overflows. So instead of waiting around for someone else to see us and appreciate us, we're going to do it for ourselves. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

Speaker 1:

And when you're at the front of the line when it comes to acknowledging your contributions and your efforts turns out. We don't need it so much from anyone else. That's just math. We have to be our own PR in this life. Showing the world that we know our worth starts a ripple effect. Soon you're going to see yourself become a magnet for people who see you, who appreciate you, instead of going out and trying to convince everyone of your worth. So try this. Every Sunday evening, spend one hour doing something that you love Reading a book, taking a bath, watching your favorite show and, in your sexy solitude, take time to think about your week's achievements. My go-to self-care is some trashy TV in the bathtub with a cup of tea, followed by a lotion ritual involving four different body creams. Mind, body and spirit are all worthy of my time and attention. Not to mention, it feels amazing.

Speaker 1:

So, looking at number four, it's setting personal goals and celebrating the milestones. Getting up in the morning and just winging it is so last year. Setting personal goals gives you something to strive for and celebrating milestones along the way keeps you motivated. Remember, the goals don't have to be huge mountains. They can be as big or as small as you like. There's no rules here, and if your goals do look like mountains. It's key to break them down into small, bite-sized pieces. Then you get to celebrate along the way.

Speaker 1:

So try this. Even putting five minutes per day towards your goal deserves a cheer, because it's the act of you dedicating time for you and that is a win, no matter what you accomplish in those five minutes. So, for example, if you've set a goal to run 5k, celebrate your progress with mini rewards like a new workout outfit or a day off to relax. So all this can seem really new and really foreign. As much as we're motivated to do it, we have to learn that we're going to be pivoting away from our old ways and into these new ways. So let's look at how we're going to be responding differently in order to break those old tendencies. As a recovering people pleaser, some of these habits are gonna take you to new places and quite possibly outside of your comfort zone.

Speaker 1:

Breaking the habit of people pleasing is challenging but doable. The key here is awareness and simply by being aware, you're ahead of the game when, once we came last, we're working on getting ourselves back to top spot. So here's what we got to do differently. First, we got to practice saying no. Saying no, it's essential for setting boundaries. It's basically the main ingredient, and it's not about rejecting others, but it is about respecting our own limits. It's not about building walls. It's more about protecting our own peace. There's no one else in charge of that. So, for example, if you're asked to take on some extra work but you're already swamped or tired or have other things to do or frankly don't want to, you can politely decline and maybe or maybe not explain what else you're up to. Check out the post about the power of no to deep dive on this particular topic.

Speaker 1:

The next thing you can do is make self-care your number one hobby. Make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine. Just get really good at it. Find out what luxury you can afford to turn into a habit. Getting your nails done, having an hour-long bubble bath, me time with your favorite book in your favorite coffee shop it's all self-care and it's vital for maintaining your mental and physical health. And if there's one nugget that I've learned about self-care, is that it's not a special occasion. It works best when it's a habit.

Speaker 1:

Do not wait until your cup is empty to start taking care of yourself. Do not wait until you're burnt out to show yourself some grace and some love. This is the key to keeping your cup full, and you're the only one in charge of that. So, for example, schedule some regular me time in your calendar and treat it like any other important appointment. If someone needs you during that time, you're not available, you're busy.

Speaker 1:

The next thing we want to get good at is delegation and asking for help, because newsflash you don't have to do everything. Don't get me wrong. I believe that you can do anything, but that doesn't mean that you have to do everything. Sometimes we think that when someone asks us to do something, we're the only ones who can do it, or at least that's what we tell ourselves. So I'm going to challenge you. Are you really? We sometimes overestimate our own importance and underestimate the possibility that someone else could do it. Now the control freak in me is like but they won't do it as well as me, and I'm probably right. But then I ask does that matter? So I ask you what do you need to let go of to make space for what's good for you? Don't be afraid to delegate tasks or ask for help when you need it. It's a sign of strength, not weakness. So try this If you're overwhelmed with responsibilities and to-do lists or can't find room on your plate for things that are important to you, ask for help. Ask a colleague or a friend or a family member, whatever the scenario is to help, or delegate the thing that you think maybe other people can handle. They might surprise you with their willingness to help and their support for your well-being.

Speaker 1:

The next thing that might be tricky is to focus on quality, not quantity. Sometimes less is more. Shift your focus from doing many things to doing a few things really well. Quality over quantity. Make sure that you're putting your best stuff into what matters most. Do the stuff that matters to you first. That's how you show yourself commitment to your own goals. So try this. Instead of volunteering for all the committees which is our go-to move, after all choose one where you can make the most impact. Do you want to drill a thousand one-foot holes, or maybe a hole that's 1,000 feet deep? Look at your current schedule and review what's most important to you and see how you can lean out your list of to-dos.

Speaker 1:

Then we want to find the perfect in the imperfection. Perfectionism often drives people-pleasing. Learning to love imperfection and understand that it's okay to make mistakes and get messy it can take some time and definitely some grace. It's a tough thing to unlearn, but when we take a beat, we realize that there's beauty in the imperfection all around us. So try this when a project doesn't go perfectly, focus on what you learned and how you can improve, rather than dwelling on the mistakes.

Speaker 1:

So let's get back to our main point here, which is don't be shy to celebrate yourself. Just don't be a jerk about it. So let's look at balancing self-celebration with some humility. Celebrating yourself doesn't mean becoming arrogant or self-absorbed. It's about finding a healthy balance where you acknowledge your worth without overshadowing other people.

Speaker 1:

I'm a huge believer that there is room at the top for everyone. Your success doesn't have to come at the expense of someone else's, and the same goes for the reverse. If someone else wins, that doesn't mean that you won't. When you celebrate with humility, you shine, and it sets out a welcome mat for people to celebrate with you, and that's just more fun. So one of the things you want to remember is that everyone has something worthy of celebrating. I'm convinced of it. And while it's important to celebrate yourself, it's safe to say that other people around you enjoy being celebrated too. Make a point to seek out things to celebrate for other people and remind them that it's worth celebrating, you will feast off the amazing energy that comes from calling out someone else's sparkle will feast off the amazing energy that comes from calling out someone else's sparkle. When you share your light with someone else, your light doesn't get dimmer, you just have twice as much light.

Speaker 1:

So try this. Challenge yourself to keep your eyes open for something your bestie is working on and make a point to celebrate a milestone with them, like over the top, take a small win and make it huge. The key here is to have some fun. Remember that the next thing you can do is keep a gratitude journal Along with your celebration journal or whatever cool name you've come up with. You can keep a gratitude journal. Recognizing what you're grateful for keeps you grounded and humble. Reminding yourself of all the great things in your life keeps those things close close in your mind and close in your heart. Then there's no room for despair and doom and gloom. You know we got time for that. So try this Each day.

Speaker 1:

Write down three things you're grateful for, including things that you appreciate about yourself and other people. So to wrap this up, when it comes to celebrating yourself, doing so is a key practice for anyone, especially for those of us who are natural born people pleasers. By shifting some of that outward focus inward, we can build a healthier relationship with ourselves, prevent burnout and ultimately be better equipped to support and uplift the good people around us. Remember, self-celebration isn't about being selfish. It's about recognizing our own amazing worth and contribution, which, in turns, lets you to give more genuinely and sustainably. So let's start today.

Speaker 1:

Take a moment, reflect on your amazingness and celebrate you. You deserve it. So, my fellow recovering people pleasers, I challenge you to take a leap of faith, and I want you to put that faith in yourself. Start celebrating all that you've done so far, to tap into your true and finest self, and you can do so knowing that there's going to be a little bit of discomfort at first, because it might be new, but you can do so knowing that on the other side lies freedom and fulfillment. You deserve a life that's true to you, one where your needs are just as important as anyone else's. Remember, you are worthy of love and respect, exactly as you are. By getting good at self-celebration, you're not only honoring yourself, but you're also teaching others how to treat you. So go ahead, step into your power and watch as your life transforms in ways that you never thought possible.

Speaker 1:

Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. Remember, self-love and self-acceptance are the foundation for a Mojo Master. Remember, self-love and self-acceptance are the foundation for a Mojo Master, and I know that you have everything you need to live a full life, to fill your own cup and to drink in all the good stuff that this life has to offer. We deserve it. Come back next week where we are going to explore all that is recognition and praise, why we love it and how to be at the front of the line and how to keep it healthy. So make sure you subscribe to Pocketful of Mojo wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts, and come back next week to unwrap the gift that we give ourselves, capisce. So until then, stay awesome, keep spreading those positive vibes and be kind out there. Toodle-oo kangaroo you.

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